Politically correct

Here are some politically correct definitions(?) . Feel free to add your own as comments

alive: temporarily metabolically abled

clumsy: uniquely coordinated

crime rate: street activity index

dead: living impaired; terminally inconvenienced

death: post-viability outplacement

dishonest: ethically disoriented

drunk: sobriety deprived

elderly: chronologically experienced; chronologically gifted

fail: achieve a deficiency

fat: laterally enhanced

gossip: community information dissemination specialist

heavy: gravitationally compromised

homeless person: urban camper

lazy: motivationally deficient

mass murderer: indiscriminate life cessations

pregnant: parasitically oppressed

rude: cordiality impaired

spendthrift: negative saver

stoned: chemically inconvenienced

stupid: differently clued

ugly: aesthetically challenged